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Taking time to
By Maureen Brownlee In a happy relationship, each person’s life is intricately interwoven with the other’s. But as we all know, it’s really important to maintain individual interests, activities and friendships that round out our lives and result in our being a happier human being and better life partner. Self identity is vital to our self worth. As partners, family or friends of someone with a disability or illness, our nurturing instinct is to immerse ourselves in supporting our loved ones, whether it’s emotionally, physically or both. We absolutely should be there to support them—that’s what families do. But it’s unhealthy to the wellbeing of ourselves and those we care for to allow our lives to be solely defined by our loved one’s medical situation. Work may provide a separate activity, but we need more. There’s often times when I force myself to go out with friends because I would prefer in many ways to stay home with my family. But my husband will urge me to go (can it possibly be that he likes a break?). I treasure my weekends with my girlfriends of over 30 years, when they pamper me and we shop, eat and laugh. I come back re-energized and full of stories to share with my family. If you’re not taking time for yourself, I urge you to make this a priority. Look after you, so you can better look after your partner, friend or family member. Don’t lose yourself, you are much too important! You may want to visit www.wellspouse.org for some inspiration and practical advice. If you have other website recommendations, stories or thoughts you’d like to share, please email me at mbrownlee@bcpara.org. Remember, family matters…and so do you! |
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